


Don’t Use Modern Slang, Angel

by slimysheep



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Domestic, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Godparents Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Idiots in Love, M/M, Misunderstandings, One Shot, adam young ships it, aziraphale is trying is best, but not the bad kind!!, crowley is also trying his best, hes like the child they never knew they needed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-05-18 18:15:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19339930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slimysheep/pseuds/slimysheep
Summary: Aziraphale wants to get in touch with his more hip side, and when he asks Adam how to properly use modern slang, Adam teaches him (but not in the way you think)orAziraphale calls Crowley a thot out of love and Crowley is shocked( based on that one twitter post from (incorrect) good omens )





	Don’t Use Modern Slang, Angel

**Author's Note:**

> I watched the series and I absolutely adored the book and the prompt wouldn’t get out of my head. I do hope i conveyed them right and i had a lot of fun writing this. Enjoy 💕💕💕💕

Maybe Aziraphale was spending too much time with Adam. The angel would valiantly deny this, of course, but even he could admit that Adam’s influence was rubbing off on him. His influence was mostly good, of course, as he was a good child, at least, for the most part.

 

Adam felt more in contact with the two supernatural( or in the angels case ‘ethereal’) beings. It only made sense, as the apocowasnt brought them closer together.

 

The child hung out with them both at least thrice a month, as Tadfield was quite a drive, but still managed to take time out to hang out with the antichrist. Often they came together, and Adam would joke about them being a couple, which responded Aziraphale, in a bright smile going ‘A couple of best friends!’ and missing the joke ~~_suggestion_~~  and Crowley flushing bright red in response and awkwardly laughing.

 

Adam was thankful to have an angel and demon on his shoulders, watching over him. He was able to share things he couldn’t with his parents and do stuff that would otherwise get him grounded. Crowley and Aziraphale felt strong admiration and even would go so far to say that Adam was their godson if anyone were to ask.

 

So here was Aziraphale, with Adam in his bookshop, helping him sort through some new additions of books. Of course the angel could’ve done this himself, yet Adam begged to get a tour around the bookshop and to see if he wanted to buy any of the books. (Aziraphale would’ve pushed away his crumpled pounds anyways and given it for free.)

 

The floor was covered in new books, scattered and stacked on top of each other while the angel sorted alphabetically. Adams piles were more way more chaotic, however.

 

“Modern slang simply flies over my head, I'm afraid,” Aziraphale stated, flipping through a couple pages before setting the book down. “Perhaps you could teach me a few words?” He looked expectantly at Adam, who had his head turned in sync with his dog.

 

“Why do you want to learn them now? Haven’t you been around for like thousands of years and not cared?” He questioned.

 

“A little over six thousand,” Aziraphale corrected before taking a sip of his lukewarm cocoa. “I passed some teenagers while on a walk and it sounded as if they were speaking a completely different language!”

 

“What words were they saying?”

 

He took a pregnant pause before responding.

 

“Thot? I think, as well as tea, which they were not talking about in reality, and something about waking up?”

 

“Woke?”

 

“That’s correct,” 

 

Adam laughed in response. This was fun. This was a way he could get the angel on his shoulder to either learn modern slang or construed it to his benefit. And Adam really liked the second option.

 

“Let’s start with thot, that means…”

 

🦑

 

Crowley sprayed his plants, the water hitting their near perfect leaves, shaking in fear as his serpent eyes surveyed them in depth.

 

“Hmm,” he hummed, “Looks like everyone is looking decent,” he smiled, sharp teeth poking his bottom lip.

 

“I want you looking at your prime when I come back. ‘Zira might come back, and I will  _ not  _ accept slacking,” He gave one last toothy grin before walking out of his house, car already rearing and ready to go.

 

He plopped in, rubbing the dashboard lovingly. “Already baby,” the demon muttered, “let’s go see our angel.”

 

No less than twenty minutes later, the Bentley and it’s owner pulled up to the remote bookshop, standing in all its non-burned glory. He let himself smile fondly at seeing Adam and Aziraphale happily chatting amongst each other in the window.

 

The demon opened the door, both heads twisting to see the visitor. Adam smiled and waved at Crowley as he walked in the door, while Aziraphale simply beamed white teeth at his company. He seemed confused for a second before checking a clock in the room and gasping.

 

“Oh, Heavens, I’ve lost track of time, Adam will be needing a ride home,” Aziraphale gave those puppy eyes that struck Crowley right in the heart, and Zira wasn’t even aware he was giving them off. “I wouldn’t want to impose, Crowley,” 

 

Crowley sighed and spun his keys around his finger, even though he never really used them. Adam shot up, two thick books and a couple magazines in his hands.

 

“Get in, kid,” Adam ran to the car, clearly excited about being able to go for a ride in one of the coolest cars in all of the United Kingdom. Dog followed behind him shortly.

 

Aziraphale followed behind the demon slightly, before speaking up.

 

“I do apologize for not keeping track of time. Adam was indulging me greatly,” he clasped his hands together.

 

Crowley’s lips raised slightly. “All’s well that ends well, angel,” he ushered Aziraphale out of the door and the angel smiled and nodded in response.

 

The angel, demon, a Hellhound, and a mortal child all entered the Bentley, and it was switched on with a flick of Crowley’s wrist. Queen played from the speakers and as they exited the bustling streets to the quiet and remote place of Tadfield, pages in the back of the car were heard turning.

 

“Adam, pray tell, what’s on the agenda for this week?” As Crowley spoke, Freddie’s voice lowered in volume.

 

Adam set the books down at his side, keeping a firm hand on them, knowing that Crowley was an almost reckless driver. He hummed in consideration.

 

“We’re taking Dog to the vet,” his pet whined, understanding the horror of the veterinarian. “I’m going to see my grandparents, maybe stay with them a couple of days, ummm, I think that’s all.” He nodded as confirmation to himself. “What are you doing this week?”

 

Crowley raised an eyebrow. He didn’t work. Demons didn’t work, he simply caused some minor inconveniences among people and he called that work. So he couldn’t really say he was working this week as most people responded. He shrugged.

 

“Might buy a new Arrowhead, mine has been showing signs of wilting. Ah, a Sago palm would be convenient, too,” He envisioned it, for a moment. The plants getting along with the two new ones as he threatened them with an inch of their lives.

 

A light chuckle broke him from his vision. Aziraphale had his hand to his mouth, trying to suppress his laughter. Crowley gave him an offended look.

 

“What is so funny?” The demon asked the angel, earning an honest smile back that Crowley knew he couldn’t stay even a bit annoyed at.

 

“Nothing, just you and your plants. I find it amusing. Although, you are too harsh on them,” he accused.

 

Crowley took his hands off the steering wheel to raise them in an incredulous manner. 

 

“Hands on the steering wheel!” Crowley obliged, grumbling, still expectant on a response. “You frighten them. For a plant to grow most divinely, you must nurture it with love and admiration.”

 

Crowley scoffed at his answer. “My plants are growing fine, thank you very much,” Aziraphale almost laughed again.

 

“Your house plants would grow so much better if you gave them the love they deserved!”

 

“Can you guys be quiet,” Adam groaned, head hitting the back of the seat. “You two bicker like an old couple. Like my parents,”

 

The two supernatural beings made eye contact and looked away quickly, red spreading across their features as they went quiet, much to Adams contentment.

 

When they pulled by Adam’s house, they bid him farewell, and Aziraphale told him to enjoy his books. Crowley, on the other hand, leaned down to dog, telling him to enjoy the vet, getting a growl in return. The demon ended up laughing it off.

 

They got back in the car, Queen playing still at a low volume. Aziraphale chuckled to himself before speaking again.

 

“Adam was teaching me modern slang!” He smiled and Crowley let out a groan.

 

“What did he taint your precious, innocent mind with, angel?” Crowley was up to date, as he always was with modern times. He adjusted each century while Aziraphale still enjoyed thinking and living back in the last century. It was just how they worked and functioned, Crowley gave up each year trying to explain something that would never click with the angel.

 

“Okay, well, since you took Adam home, and are now taking me out to the Ritz, I would say you’re a thot,” Aziraphale said, admiration dripping from his voice.

 

Crowley swerved the car, nearly swinging off of the road in his shock. The angel shouted out ‘mind the road!’ but Crowley was too surprised to even hear it.

 

After almost hitting another car and straightening the Bentley back onto the road, all the demon could do was stare at Aziraphale, mouth opened and eyes wide.

 

“What was that about?” The angel shouted, concerns about being discorporated heightening. Crowley didn’t bother answering his question as his own was brought up.

 

“I’m a what?” He sputtered, and the angel only looked more confused.

 

“A thot,” Crowley’s confusion was replaced by laughter and he almost swerved once more with how hard he was laughing. When he looked back at Aziraphale, the tears in his eyes couldn’t obscure the look of horror on his face.

 

“What is so funny, I-I don’t understand,” The angel tilted his head, feeling like he had missed a queue or a joke.

 

“What-What do you think ‘thot’ means, angel?” He asked, sharp teeth on display with how wide his grin was.

 

“It means a thoughtful or a caring person. I assumed you were caught up on modern slang?” Aziraphale looked into Crowley’s serpent eyes trying to search for an answer, but only getting a dilation of the pupils as a response.

 

“And Adam taught you this, right?” The demon asked and Zira nodded. 

 

“Ahh,” Crowley sighed, one of those sighs that just made you know that they were satisfied. “Never change, angel, never change.”

 

After a fantastic dinner and an even better time with his best friend _~~crush~~_ Aziraphale searched what the word meant when he went home, not trusting Adam after Crowley’s reactions and was almost horrified in response.

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
